Regarding life at its current state in its political climate, I find myself to be pretty angry and worried. This worry is something I may not actively dwell on all the time but it’s still there, under the surface.
*Image credit goes to thi.de on Instagram who kindly provided me with illustrations to use for this blog.
2017 was one of the best year’s in my life – but regarding the last few years as objectively as I possibly can, I find myself looking back at that year with sadness. For it seemed like the constant fear of “oh no what happened this time?” was upon all of us. That sickening feeling you would get in the morning when checking your text messages only to see people asking you if you had heard what had happened over night. At least it was like that for me. After mass shootings, bombings, wars,… the whole world in chaos – there was always this sensation of “what’s next?” in my anxious mind.
Although I am privileged enough to live somewhere safe (although who knows what the definition of safe even is nowadays) the events of the past years affected me deeply. For the first time in my life I was truly aware of the bubble I had been living in during my childhood, the sheltered environment my parents had brought me up in. And I longed to be that child again. The child that thought Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy were real, the little me that concocted whole worlds in my head. I yearned for that time again, where anything was possible, where little things meant the world to me.
As to why I am only addressing this now – I don’t really know. I guess I have been in a very contemplative mood recently. I wrote a post on feeling stuck not too long ago and well, I guess I’m not the only one right now – the whole world seems to be stuck in this horrible, terrifying state. There is so much hatred in people right now, so much rage and anger that we all let it out on each other like wild animals. Maybe some of you will gather this to be naive thinking but I just hope that we all find a way to move forward as a society, to collectively evolve into something we can be proud of. Because right now, it feels like we’re only taking steps backwards as time slowly runs out.