Boom. I’m back. / the education diary (6)

Hello hello,

it feels like ages since I last sat down and wrote a little update entry about what *the hell* is going on in my life. It’s June now and my god, am I longing for summer break. All of the stress I had in May was just the build-up to what June is like right now. Exams. Deadlines. Exams. Deadlines. The circle of death (and the one beneath my tired eyes🙃). But despite all of it, I can’t really say that the last few months have been bad in any way. Here’s the thing – I like being busy (even though I complain about it sometimes), it gives me a sense of purpose that over the time I have found I need in order to function properly.


My last year of being a teen

So, what have I been up to recently? Well, there was my birthday for one. It was at the beginning of May and although I hadn’t really planned on celebrating (for some reason my birthday has just gotten less and less significant for me over the years), I spontaneously decided that I needed to do something different, push myself a little more.  Some of you might remember that I am currently trying to do that in order to control my anxiety a little more. Even though I had been feeling a little down on the days leading up to the big 1-9, the day itself actually put me in a better mood again.

Unfortunately my birthday was on a Friday, so I still had to go to uni for most of the day. K and L surprised me that morning with a box full of things that I love. It was so thoughtful and nice of them and it honestly made up for having to study all day. My mum was also really sweet about my birthday. She picked me up on the day of my birthday and we just spent a relaxed mother-daughter evening together, my dad and brother eventually joining us for dinner at this cool Japanese restaurant. On Saturday I invited a few of my closest friends and we ended up going to a bar located right by the Danube. After that we went to a club and in all honesty, I didn’t think I would have as much fun as I did. Props to my friends for being so great ❥

I lot of people asked me what it felt like now that I was nineteen and boy oh boy, I wish I could give them an exciting answer. But truthfully, being 19 doesn’t feel different from 18 at all. It’s not like everything about you changes just because you’re a year older. Change takes time. You know what won’t take a lot of time? Me turning 20. T-W-E-N-T-Y! In a year! Just writing that down kind of makes me feel nervous. I’ll have to think of a new blog name. In my head, me being in my twenties seems like such a far-away concept but I know that the upcoming year will go by fast – here’s why:


Belgium.

This has been something that has been in the works for quite a while now – a semester abroad in Belgium. Part of the reason I have been so stressed out lately is because I had to fill out a stack of forms and applications for my semester abroad. K and L included, as we are all going to Belgium together. And I am so excited to write that we will be officially going to Belgium starting next September! Man, excited doesn’t even begin to describe the joy I felt when I got that acceptance email.

The application process had been a bumpy process for us because we mostly had to rely on ourselves to get everything done because the lady who was supposed to help us was sick. For three months. And then she came back looking ten shades darker. NOPE, excuse me if I don’t believe you were too ill to even respond to our emails or to forward us to someone who could help us in the mean time. Thank god we relied on ourselves and not on her because by the time she came back, all of the application deadlines were already over.

But woohoo, Belgium! I can’t wait. I think especially because I was just talking about stepping out of my comfort zone, it will really help me grow as a person and redefine the barriers of my safety bubble. I will of course be taking all of you along for my semester abroad and am sure that I will have tons of content for The Education Diary series. And what makes me even happier is that I get to share that experience with K and L, who have become something like my lifeline when I’m stressed.


Going out more in the midst of chaos

May started out with a bang and that bang continued from there on. That’s right, yours truly has been hitting up the clubs and has been enjoying the night life more again. Even if it’s just spending time at a bar with a few friends in the evening, I have been loving letting go and just forgetting about my responsibilities and WhatsApp Image 2018-06-07 at 21.43.35worries for a few hours. It’s fun, it makes me feel free and I feel young again. As stupid as it soundsit’s easy to forget that I am just nineteen sometimes, especially when there are responsibilities waiting for me at every corner. Oftentimes I will feel so old in comparison to people that in reality are only a year or two my junior. Growing up is weird, man. Shoutout to my friend K, for being so charming in this picture:

One person I have been spending more time with again is J, one of my best friends from middle school. We reconnected a few months ago and have been going out together more and more ever since. It’s kind of nice talking to her again, as there was never really a reason behind us going our separate ways. We just ended up in different high schools, which eventually led to us growing apart. The best thing about talking again after years of radio silence is the fact that we are getting to know each other again. It would be naive to think that we haven’t evolved over time, so being able to rediscover her personality and learn more about her has been such a rewarding process for me.

We recently went to a small festival together and I had the best time. We also ran into one of my childhood friends and ended up spending most of the evening with her and another group of popele, all just laughing and talking. It was a great night, one of the best.


Taking some time for myself

Some of you might have noticed that I definitely haven’t been posting as often as I normally do. Part of it is due to exams, another due to lack of inspiration. I have been putting so much hard work into this blog and all of my creative projects for these last few months that I just needed to recharge for a while. To be frank, I definitely needed that small break from blogging so regularly. It was all reaching a boiling point, me desperatly trying to stick to some sort of schedule while still producing content I genuinely felt proud of. I feel like I finally have my groove back and can slowly start creating and writing again. I have TONS of ideas already.

*Currently in the process of catching up with all of your blogs*


What about you? What have you been up to lately?

Wishing everyone a lovely summer holiday and to those of you who still have to study (like me unfortunately) I am wishing the best of luck for all of your exams!

Love,
a very happy, yet exhausted (ugh, exam season) Fiona x

WhatsApp Image 2018-06-07 at 21.45.04

16 thoughts on “Boom. I’m back. / the education diary (6)

  1. Happy belated birthday!

    You make being young sound the same as being old. That’s talent for ya.

    But yeah, I agree twenty is a daunting number. Wait till you reach your thirties *wink* *wink*

    (Like I’m one to speak, I’m not even seventeen)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Rayan!

      You think so? Oops. But maybe I’m just an old granny in a teens body hahaha. Actually, that’s EXACTLY what I am, who am I kidding. And oh my god, I was freaking out about my twenties but 30?! *flinch* flinch*

      Time flies when you’re a teenager (I sound old again, don’t I?). But seriously, don’t forget to stop for a minute in the midst of everything going on around you and savour those precious moments.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. WELCOME TO 19 GIRL! I’m 20 in 6 months… terrifying prospect! Good luck with all of your exams, honestly I don’t envy you exam season *shudders in horror* but I know you’re gonna do amazing! I’m SO FREAKING EXCITED FOR YOU TO STUDY ABROAD! It’s gonna be such an amazing adventure for you and Belgium looks absolutely beautiful. So pleased you’re taking time for yourself and having fun, you can tell you’re a really hard worker so you absolutely deserve it ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Mia! I actually think that you will rock your twenties, though I can relate to it being a somewhat terrifying prospect.
      AND ME TOO! I’m excited to see what Belgium has to offer. And thanks girl, you’re the sweetest xxxx

      Like

  3. Happy belated birthday girly, even though I’m only 20 hearing you speak about it in that way makes me feel so OLD hahaha, honestly nothing changes, I kind of had it in my head that once I was 20 I was officially an adult as I was out of my teenage years forever, but I got over it pretty quickly and I guess it’s true what they say – your 20s are your selfish years. It’s all about me now !! Hahaha, I’m kidding. If anything I guess it’s kinda made me feel like I can officially start planning everything I want to do and know what I (hopefully) would like to achieve once I get to each year in my 20s, hopefully it’s the same for you. So glad you have great people surrounding you (and that you had a great birthday) and that you’re going to Belgium together !! So exciting, I’m jealous. Keep us posted!! Glad you’re back xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Just read this back and it sounds like I thought you were 20 now (I was just tryna give some advice for when you DO turn 20 but it just looks like I got the wrong end of the stick but I KNOW you’re 19) hjdfdfldg this probably makes no sense BYE

      Liked by 1 person

      1. First of all, Chloe, you’re the cutest person ever. Thank you for sharing your advice with me, it truly means a lot that you took the time to sit down and write this amazing comment that put a smile on my face.

        I hope it’s the same for me too! I’m excited for my twenties, I really am. It’s not that I have a lot of expectations or that I think that there will be an instant change, I think it’s more like reaching a milestone for me. 20 is such a symbolic age to me somehow. xxxx

        Liked by 1 person

  4. HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAYYY! (Daaaang 20 soon. I’ll be there in 3 years and I’m already freaking out. I’M NOT READY TO LIFE)

    Taking some time for yourself is definitely important. I’ve been feeling the exact same way. Running around for college, and lack of inspiration *sigh*

    But I absolutely CANNOT WAIT to see what all ideas you have in store! (Whoop whoop! Excited.)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Arshia (!!!), I can actually exactly remember the day I realised I was 3 years from 20 because I told my mum and she FREAKED OUT. I think it was the first time both of us fully noticed how much I had grown up in the last couple of years and how quickly time goes by. So I can relate to your comment 100%, it’s a scary thought because it seems like such a far away concept but then it creeps up on you and you’re like OH SHIT.

      Hope you’e been giving yourself a break then if you’re feeling a bit drained! (I definitely recommend, I feel like I can do anything again now).

      Woohoo, glad you’re looking forward to future content! I’m happy to Start making it again 😉

      Like

  5. Good luck with your exams! I broke up for Summer last Friday but I have been so busy with additional courses and seeing friends that I haven’t had much time to relax as of yet. Have you got anything planned for summer yet? xx

    Liked by 1 person

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